77. Kimneet Dhatt
A British-Indian poet who explores themes of identity and belonging.
Kimneet Kaur Dhatt is a poet from Hull, now based in Sheffield. She is a second-generation British-Indian, having written all her life, she has just recently begun sharing her poems. Her work explores themes of identity, migration, belonging and personal growth.
Poems
When I Was Born
When I was born I had lots of grand plans Plans for my own life But my family had other ideas They had their own unconscious agenda I was born to be free Unchained Limitless Instead I was an emotional dumping ground For people Who did not have the luxury of therapy Who were all in survival mode Slowly I was suffocated by their emotions Their trauma became my trauma The secrets Shame Rage Fear All internalised All directed at me I became the curator of a gallery Filled with terrors That were not my own As I grew Year by year My innocence was drowned In the sea of their emotions Until I thought I was dead My spirit Bravery Likes and dislikes All non-existent I was numb I numbed myself Avoiding feeling the tsunami of emotions That weren’t even mine But that I carried regardless For those Too terrified to address them Leaving the country saved me Relying on myself alone Saved my life Distance healed wounds I had no idea existed Slowly A change happened Invisible to the naked eye Felt only deep in my bones The bricks around my true self Began to crumble I met myself For the first time The person I thought had drowned It turns out they can’t kill What was never really theirs to destroy <<<
Falling
I fell Into fear Even with all the tools With all the experience Knowledge Wisdom Of where I had been And where I was going I tumbled Down a spiral A black hole Alice in wonderland Only this was not wonderous This was the stuff of nightmares This was every bad decision All the doubt Anxiety And fear So much fear I fell I could not stop myself Until the next day When it all felt like I’d been on a bad trip <<<
Butterfly
Canada Dry Ready salted hula hoops Fruit cake Dominoes tournaments Never once did she say I love you Yet she showed it Every day Paisley curtains Plum trees False teeth Laughter always Witnessing my growth Into womanhood Shaping me Into a woman who Takes no prisoners Who knows her worth Who loves openly And loudly For the women before her Who couldn’t show vulnerability Hardened by life Strong like a butterfly Unstoppable Even in a storm Resilient Relentless Gentle like a cool breeze Caressing your mind <<<
Inheritance
There is nothing Anyone can do To prepare you For loss There is nothing Anyone can say To guide you As you empty a house Once filled with life As you rummage Through drawers You have no business looking in Waiting Waiting for them to come back Realising All that is left Are things The bag of baby clothes they knitted for you The bracelet they bought to gift you The necklace they treasured Their favourite teapot The always stocked biscuit tin The spice tray The only thing you really wanted to inherit Instead you got so much more There are the lessons they taught you Patience Or lack thereof Work ethic To take every opportunity given to us In this country And turn it into gold The home remedies to heal a cold The wisdom that lives in my body The knowing The strength To move countries Make friends Learn languages In a place that will tell you This will never truly be your home The strength To stay Freedom To be the first women in my lineage To choose her own life To choose herself That is my inheritance <<<
Golden Hoops
We were a gift It’s magical being a gift The joy of the new owner Opening the box The way they fawn Over us The new adventures that await We started in India She spotted us at the jewellers 50 years ago A purchase like this was new Especially buying for herself Her hands were rough She worked in manual labour She was encouraged to buy something To pick something out To treat herself To invest in something That reminded her of how far she’s come She came from a wealthy family But leaving her homeland was hard She worked her way back to wealth And she picked us! We went on adventures UK, India, Canada, Panama Then after 15 years She gave us as a gift We were sad to see her go Until we discovered the recipient Her daughter! This was going to be it The way her eyes sparkled When she saw us We knew It was going to be fun Only it wasn’t She worked even harder than the last one Only on special occasions Did we come out We were sad to be hidden We thought that was it for us Left alone in a box forever Unexpectedly 20 years later A new one! She’s the one! She was the adventurer we were waiting for The places we’ve been The things we’ve done And will do We can’t wait to see what comes Who she becomes Who we get to meet in another 20 years <<<
Five Stars
It started off in fear In anger In addiction A violent house Anxious attachment A desperate need to be loved Nurtured For innocence to stay a while But instead There was only a cage Years passed The cage opened It turned out Not to be a cage at all But a painted box She was trapped inside By those who loved her Kept small Kept quiet Not anymore The cage was replaced By an open space Fertile and rich Space to grow And expand Space to design A life worth living It took time Shedding layers Of societal expectations Of generational trauma To develop the ability to say no And make herself a priority It started working out Quiet synchronicities Ease and flow Then all at once A blooming garden A bursting dam Her life was changed Like the pumpkin at midnight She was transformed Into the person Who would have saved her Into a woman She never knew she could be She was transformed Into her wildest dreams <<<
Beautifully written pieces 👏🏽 thanks for sharing your experience and journey with such wonderful words Poet Kimneet Kaur Dhatt ✍🏽
You’re so kind, thanks so much Angèle!!